I read this article upon The FARANG speaks 2 much (you can search for the site). It’s by a contributor named BigBabyKenny. I liked his article. My comments at end.

As a professional poker player, seeing the world through another person’s eyes comes easily. In poker, the good players hold over the poor players, excellent players hold over merely good players, and world class players hold over excellent players with the ability to put oneself inside the other player’s head, understand what he is thinking, why he is doing what he is doing, and what he is trying to achieve. Players who do this, can select and implement proper counter strategies and take the money over time.

For me, seeing the world from another person’s point of view also pays away from the poker table. I find the world, specifically my time in Thailand, much richer, interesting, and entertaining when seen not only from my own but from other’s point of view.

When hanging with Thai girls, seeing the world through their eyes is useful, educational, humorous, and enlightening and I frequently empathize with them.

What is it like being a girl in Thailand? What tools and raw materials does a particular girl have to work with and whatopportunities does Thai society and a girl’s place in it make available? (1)

What are the safe investments?—where resources expended will bring a modest guaranteed return.

Where are the good gambles?—where a young Thai girl can play the cards she has been dealt, find some decent leverage and bet her limited resources with a reasonable expectation of a good payday.

What long shots are available—where everything can be cast on one roll of the dice and a fortune can be won by the lucky.

What are the sucker bets?—where a young Thai girls dissipates her resources and ends up old, dried up, destitute, and played out. (2)

When I see a Thai girl/woman a little farther on in years and in a bad situation, I can’t help but wonder whether she ended up down and out because she gambled well and got unlucky, she was too timid to ever take a risk, her life is in the shitter because she profligately expended what she had , or maybe she started out so low only a miracle would produce a decent life —and no miracle was forthcoming. (3)

Sometimes I have the pleasure and privilege to meet (and usually bang!) a Thai girl who has scoped the world, marshaled her resources, placed her bets intelligently and prudently and is waiting to see how the cards will fall, I can’t help but root for Lady Luck to smile in her direction. My admiration goes out to TG’s who play The Game of Life—The Thai Version with skill and panache—win or lose. (4)

Thailand for girls, especially the middle and lower class girls farangs normally meet, is not like The World—where everyone but the worst fuck ups have the certainty of a decent life and a comfortable standard of living.

Make no mistake, young Thai girls play a desperate game for high stakes where failure comes with disastrous consequences.

Most of these girls deal with their limited financial resources, limited skill sets, and limited opportunities with more grace, good humor, and dare I say it, more class than people in far better situations in The World.

Which brings me to the point of this essay.

It really gripes me when moralistic self righteous farangs look down their noses at TG’s who are “working” or who have chosen to pursue short or long term relationships with farangs.

It is oh so easy for someone to bring an alien morality to a country with a different culture and beliefs and stand in judgment on the choices and lives of those with different beliefs and values.

It also gripes me, but only a little less, when privileged Hi Soi Thais lord it over their less fortunate sisters and pronounce judgment on TG’s facing a limited range of choices.

It is oh so easy for someone born with money and choices, as any person in The World is when compared to most TG’s, to judge the choices and lives of people who never had the advantages, money, or options they had.

It is also easy for wannabe journalists to cop out with me-too politically correct newspaper articles portraying TG’s as desperate down and out losers and drug addicts forced into working for a living by extreme poverty or white slavers instead of looking a little bit deeper, checking your facts, trying to see The World from another person’s point of view and telling it like it is—-rather than the way some feminist handbook written tens of thousands of miles away by a person who has never been to SE Asia says it should be.

To give you an idea where most TG’s are coming from consider the following.

Only a ninth grade [Johnny : I think this means to age 14; in USA the school year appears to be actual age less 5 years] education is provided free in Thailand.

Thai companies are male dominated and rarely promote women into the upper levels of management. Educated Thai women working at large companies at best become middle managers in the support areas of a company and rarely have a role in the strategic decision making or upper management functions.

Because the Thai government and the Thai police are corrupt, entrepreneurial opportunities are proscribed. Whenever a small business is profitable the Thai police will show up and insist on a bribe for the business to continue. Of course, the size of the bribe will be proportional to the perceived profits making it difficult or impossible for a small businessman to earn much money.

Thailand is a class society where who your father is determines who you are and police and government corruption make sure you never rise much above your roots—no matter how talented or how hard you work. It is no coincidence that Thaskin, a man who made a lot of money, started out his life as a policeman and graduated to politics.

Thailand is a matriarchal society where parents wield effective authority over their children throughout their lives. One effect of this is that women from a lower social class almost never marry up into a higher social class. Unlike The World where men frequently marry women whom their parents disapprove of, Thai men almost never marry a girl without their parent’s approval and Thai parents never bless their son marrying a girl from a lower socio-economic class.

Thailand is a poor country and in most Thai households limited resources are directed toward the men. Rarely is there sufficient income to invest in the girls. (5)

For most TG’s, their only assets are their innate intelligence, youth, and looks and the only realistic opportunity to upgrade their lives is to marry or boyfriend a farang.

In Thai society, the arena where a TG’s assets have by far the most value is the farang dating scene.

Marrying or boyfriending a farang not only provides by far the best chance for a better life than her parents had, the best opportunity for having children she can actually live with and raise but also provides the only chance for a TG to liberate herself from the class prison Thai society has sentenced her to.

Grasping this point generates some insights into Thailand for farangs.

First, many of the girls you meet around Sukhumvit, especially the freelancers are not the dregs of Thai society as internet accounts and the foreign press would lead you to believe. The TG’s inhabiting farangland are not the lowest of the low forced into selling their bodies for money because they have no alternative. A good portion are exactly the opposite. The TG’s hanging around Sukhumvit pursuing farangs are frequently the cream of Thai womanhood who have voluntarily and without coercion chosen and embraced farang dating.

International immigration self selects for intelligence, entrepreneurial spirit, and creative thinking. Those who choose to uproot themselves from their home country and risk everything by migrating to a foreign country to seek a better life are the creative, intelligent, entrepreneurial risk takers. In third world countries, the best and brightest leave and the dullards stay at home slogging it out against impossible odds.

The same dynamic applies to internal immigration, i.e. TG’s forsaking Thai society and entering the farang dating milieu.

Realistically, a girl has to have superior looks to date farangs so many of the TG’s hanging around farangland aka Sukhumvit are the girls with intelligence, imagination, and ambition, who also happened to be graced with killer bods and sweet angelic faces.

Is it any wonder that many farangs coming to Thailand for holiday are wowed by their exposure to Thai women and eventually become TG addicted? Or that many farangs eventually and happily enter long term relationships with TG’s and find long term satisfaction?

Farangs in Thailand find Thai women so appealing not because the average Thai girl is so great but because the Thai women they meet represent a selective elite subset of Thai girls.

Imagine visiting Amercia and spending 100% of your time at high end fashion shows in NYC and somehow the models were convinced you were a movie director who could jump start their acting career —launching them on the upward path to fame and fortune.

If runway supermodels were the only American women you meet and they all viewed you this way wouldn’t you end up thinking American women are the best looking and nicest in the world—instead of the overweight buffalo sized ball and chains they have actually become?

Second, the internet is filled with sad sack accounts by farang men bamboozled and/or bewitched by TG’s.

On the surface, it seems pretty odd that very young girls, with limited world experience and no education seem to consistently outsmart older more experienced more worldly men and are frequently able to persuade these same men to voluntarily and happily part with ridiculous sums of money (at least from the TG’s point of view) or enter into relationships that are highly advantageous to them–but when you think deeper it makes sense.

The men who settle in Thailand are not the best and the brightest from their countries. In fact, many men relocate to Thailand because their socio-economic performance back home was anything but stellar.

On the other side of the table, the TG’s in farangland are above average in intelligence, unencumbered by politically correct western morality about their sexuality, experienced dealing with, pleasing, and manipulating men, and consequently wield their beauty and youth with the deftness of a brain surgeon cutting with his scalpel and the deadliness of a ninja assassin slicing and dicing with his killer blades.

Is it any mystery, why at the end of the night the TG frequently goes home with the money and the smile on her face and the sad sacked farang is left with empty pockets?

Or that the outcome is some type of short term exchange or long term relationship that leaves both parties better off but is highly advantageous for the TG?

Or that we frequently read accounts on the internet about TG’s getting the better of farangs but far fewer accounts of farangs besting TG’s?

I’ll admit that whenever I have the privilege of watching The Game being played between a wily TG and a farang, I usually root for the TG. Nothing is funnier and it never gets old, watching a smug well fed, self important, full of himself farang who blathers incessantly about how backward Thai society is, how stupid Thai people are, how Thai business could be run better, blah blah blah blah getting blind sided and bested by a young hot TG—-and then complaining afterwards about how they were cheated, the girl was dishonest, blah blah blah blah and expecting and frequently getting sympathy from fellow full of themselves farangs with similar experiences. I admittedly find it difficulty to keep a straight face when one of these sad sack clubs has a meeting to share horror stories.

It never seems to occur to them and, admittedly I never speak up, that it was pretty stupid from the outset to play a game against superior competition and then even more ridiculous to get mad or expect sympathy when they come out loser.

In the poker world, these guys are called Hometown Heroes. A Hometown Hero is a player from an area without organized poker or at best a small casino that spreads only a few games at low limits. The hometown hero is the best player in his home game and good enough to beat the low limit casino games in his hometown and fancies himself a world class player.

Hometown Heroes frequently give up their job and move to the bigger games of Los Angeles or Las Vegas full of hubris and with star filled eyes. When Hometown Heroes arrive in L.A. or L.V. and play in the bigger games, instead of being the best player in the game, they are now the worst. In bigger games against better players, the simple strategies and ploys which worked at home against weak competition are ineffective and deftly exploited by the more knowledgeable experienced pros.

Not only do Hometown Heroes start off losing, it is almost impossible for them to turn things around. How can you counter a strategy being used against you when you do not even know what that strategy is or why it works? Unless someone takes pity and the Hometown Hero gets some help from better players, it is almost impossible for the Hometown Hero to become an everyday winner. Hometown Heroes inevitably usually lose their bankrolls and return home busted. (6)

Many farangs in Thailand are Hometown Heroes. Back in The World, they are not good looking enough, charming enough, or rich enough to attract the attention of the best looking smartest women. When they get to Thailand just like the Hometown Hero who finds himself out of his league in a game against better players, the farang finds himself targeted by super smart super hotties—-a class of women who never give them the time of day back in The World and which they are entirely unprepared to deal with.

Is it rocket science predicting who will emerge winner in this contest?

And just like the busted poker Hometown Heroes who blame their fate on cheating, collusion among the players, and just plain bad luck, the farang Hometown Heroes who play and lose The Game with TG’s place the blame on anyone and everything for their fate—–except where it really belongs, squarely on their own shoulders.

Footnotes:

1 - The classic Robert Frost poem The Road Not Taken captures this well. Google it if you are interested.

2 - I met a TG in Nana Parking Lot last January who fit this category. She was 20, spoke excellent English (which she had learned from a previous farang BF) and, in the post Bang conversation, admitted she was a Tweaker (L.A. slang for a Yaba user). My guess is she was in the early stages of her addiction because she had none of the physical signs of a long time addict. She confessed she would take Yabaa and then go without sleep for 3 or 4 days, crash, and spend the next 3 or 4 days recovering before her next episode. Surprisingly, she was a fun companion both in bed and as a clubbing date. I lost contact with her after her cell phone number changed so I don’t know how what eventually happened to her.

3 - These are the girls you see strung along Sukhumvit at 4AM who for whatever reason are unable to work in a bar, gogo, or even go the Biergarten.

4 - Hanging with the Japanese specialists who frequent the Thermae this summer, I met two girls who fit this description. Both were in their teens and making some real money (at least to them) for the first time—they had both been working in BKK for about a year. Both girls, had saved their money and decided to invest in Japanese language classes at a language school in Siam Square with the intention of marrying a Japanese guy someday. These classes are not cheap, especially given their incomes, and constituted a major investment for them. Both had scoped the farang dating scene, decided dating and hopefully marrying a Japanese Guy was their best choice, marshaled the resources, and “placed their bets.”

5 - Thailand is a poor country. How poor? Consider the following numbers.

Thailand 2005:

Per Capita GDP = $ 2,720.00 (THB 93,198.0
Monthly = $ 226.67 (THB 7,766.62)

USA 2005:

Per Capita GDP = $ 43,560 (THB 1,492,539.84)
Monthly = $ 3,600.00 (THB 123,350.4)

A better picture can be had by looking at household income in Bangkok and in the rest of Thailand.

Household Disposable Income (Monthly):

Bangkok 2002:

Yearly = $ 9,710.82 (THB 332,731.54)
Monthly = $ 809.24 (THB 27,727.80)

Thailand 2002:

Yearly = $ 4,735.76 (THB 162,266.0
Monthly = $ 394.65 (THB 13,522.29)

6 - When you watch poker on TV have you ever noticed that most of the young successful female players are inevitably good looking. This is because in most cases the way they learned to play was to befriend or date a successful player who schooled them. Mimi Tran, Meg Tilly, and more recently Maria Ho are examples of this.

My comments

Overall I thought that this was a very insightful, and intelligently written article. It’s easier to just list the little that I don’t agree with.

The TGs hanging around Sukhumvit pursuing farangs are frequently the cream of Thai womanhood who have voluntarily and without coercion chosen and embraced farang dating.

I don’t agree. Some are dregs, some are not, some are lazy, some need a quick cash injection to a faltering income, but none are the cream of Thai society.

The men who settle in Thailand are not the best and the brightest from their countries. In fact, many men relocate to Thailand because their socio-economic performance back home was anything but stellar.

That’s way too much of a generalisation, although I can imagine it being partly true.

Being smart, isn’t always about earning the most money. Who can say that the guy with an unhurried life in Thailand and a beautiful Thai wife or girlfriend is not smart? His financial performance may not have been stellar, but I can respect his decision.

I’m not defending myself here. I don’t live in Thailand, although I do have intention to purchase an apartment.

For most TGs, their only assets are their innate intelligence, youth, and looks, and the only realistic opportunity to upgrade their lives is to marry or boyfriend a farang.

I don’t know, although there has to be an element of truth here else we wouldn’t see older men (both Thai and Farang) with young Thai girls so frequently.

I’ll twist this just a little. It’s been my (limited) experience that I have had absolutely the best chances of developing successful long term relationships with university educated Thai girls. Go-go girls, and coyote girls have been scatterbrained and have not recognised a good thing (if I may be bold enough to describe myself thus because the girls have thought so) when they have it. The educated girls, however, have gone to great lengths to look after me.

The point that I’m making is that the lowest class girls, from the poorest backgrounds, are not necessarily your best bet. Except for Hi-So girls, almost all Thai girls are poor compared to us travelling farangs. You might be tempted to think that the poorer the girl, the better your chances, but I have found that a higher class of girl is a better ticket.

Positive example : The girl that I will be dating as soon as I return to Thailand later this month ( May 2008 ) speaks good English, majored in tourism at university, is about to start another univerity course (June), and holds down a part time job in respectable work - which is where I saw/met/pursued her. No gogo girl has ever treated me the way that she does.

10-05-08 : My good friend L took a group of us to the Saturday qualifying for the 2008 Indy 500.

We travelled south from Elkhart in a Ford F-250 with a fibreglass truck top with darkened windows. L and his eldest son were on front seat. L’s eldest daughter, her boyfriend, and yours truly were in back, i.e. the truck bed. We had a 2 person loveseat couch for the other two, and a rear facing seat removed from a Chevrolet S15 for me.

Upon arrival at the speedway, the three of us in back hid under an assortment of blankets and pillows. This actually wasn’t my idea, but I cheerfully went along with it. The net result was that only the two in the front had tp pay the $10 entrance fee.

This was my first visit to Indy, but L is a big fan, very knowledgeable, and has visited multiple times. I enjoyed the day, particularly the company of friends, but I probably wouldn’t go again, although an actual race could be different.

I felt that the official merchandise was very highly priced. I don’t like events that milk enthusiasts for as much as possible.

It was good that we went on the Saturday because Sunday was rained off !

03-05-08 : The Ice Maiden is feeling OK and very strong again. That’s all.

01-05-08 : It’s the first of the month again, and time for another car of the month. I have not received any requests to publish, so it’s from my own collection again.

This beauty has 57,191 original miles, and is probably my favourite car. I love her.

I bought her in West Virginia in February 2007.

She’s fully loaded and rust free.

Here’s a list of options and standard features that this car has :

STANDARD FEATURES
* 440 cid V8
* TorqueFlite automatic transmission
* 70 Amp battery
* Power Steering
* Power Front Disc Brakes
* Left remote mirror
* Electric clock
* 3 speed windshield wipers
* Light package
* Fender skirts
* Hood insulator pad
* Undercoating

OPTIONS FITTED
* 50/50 Bench Seat w/Recliner-Clo/VIN ($76.10)
* 50/50 6 way power seat left ($100.20)
* Tinted glass - all windows ($53.60)
* Power Windows ($133.45)
* Automatic Speed (Cruise) Control ($69.40)
* Air conditioning with heater ($426.10)
* Safeguard Sentinel Lighting ($36.55)
* Power Deck Lid Release ($15.75)
* Radio - Golden Tone - AM ($92.35)
* Rear Seat Speaker - single ($19.35)
* Steering Wheel Tile & Tel w/Rim Blow ($90.55)
* Vinyl Roof ($127.80)
* Moulding - Door Edge Protectors ($11.80)
* Tyres - J78 x 15 WSW ($40.00)
* Body Side Stripe (no cost)
* Ziebart rust proofing (March 2007)

Brocade cloth and vinyl seats

I learned an important lesson with this car. It’s really obvious when you think about it, but I hadn’t though it through beforehand.

You don’t have to spend big money to enjoy an old car.

I paid only $2,705 (OK, I got her for a really good price) for this MoPar, and yet she’s my favourite car.

Female beauty, of course, is in the Eye of the Beholder, but in this post I will venture some rules, or truths.

When a guy looks at a girl, he places her into one of five categories :

4 - Beautiful
3 - Attractive
2 - Plain
1 - Unattractive
0 - Ugly

Ugly

Very few women are truly ugly. Those that really are ugly cause men to stare.

Unattractive

Many, many women are unattractive.

Plain

About the same number going around as for Unattractive.

Attractive

The percentage of the population takes a dive now.

Beautiful

Now we’re into the top few percent, but that top few percent can vary a little from guy to guy because of the the Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder principal.

Rule 1 - Distribution of Opinion :

The breadth of opinion will never vary over more that 2 categories in any direction.

For example, if one guy thinks a girl is Beautiful, another will see her as Attractive, and a few will argue that she is Plain. None, however, will say she is Unattractive or Ugly.

Similarly, if a guy thinks a girl is Unattractive, then some other dude will say she is Ugly, while another will think she is Plain, and possibly there’ll be someone who argues that she is Attractive. None, however, will say she is Beautiful.

The point is that opinon can only vary so far.

Rule 2 - Cosmetics Enhancement :

Careful use of cosmetics may move a girl upward by one category.

For example, a Plain girl can look Attractive, but she can’t get to Beautiful.

Asia

It’s my personal belief that the distribution of Attractive and Beautiful women in asia is better than in the west. It seems that I can find a stunner any time I go out when in Bangkok or Sai Gon, yet I have never seen a comparable western woman in my home town in USA.

30-04-08 : Today I received this troubling e-mail :

to day I’ve got afever and abad headache.
and feel like vomiting I feel physical strenght declining these days.
and I don’t have any appetite these days. I just feel tire aii the time.

I have encouraged her to see a doctor ASAP. If I was in Bangkok then I would take her to the doc personally.

I wonder whether she is just too thin ? Could this be early anorexia ? Whatever, I’m worried.

29-04-08 : I have booked my flights to Thailand and Viet Nam. I arrive in Thailand very late (as usual) upon 22 May, and into VN upon 17 June.

29-04-08 : One week after applying for a SSN, I received the card in my PO Box today.

Now I can register cars to me personally at the BMV (Bureau of Motor Vehicles), amongst other things ! Previously, I have only been able to register company vehicles.

24-04-08 : I recycled a light load of aluminium and received $103. The local recycler is buying cans at $0.75 per lb.

In the evening I started work upon dismantling my 100+ tons of dies. I already broke a 1/2″ hexagonal wrench (Allen key) because of the chemical, seizing, reaction that occurs between steel and aluminium. In my case, I have two slabs of aluminium that are bolted together with round-top steel bolts. To achieve the best prices, for both aluminium and steel, I need to separate the metals; hence, the bolts have to be removed.

24-04-08 : My beautiful Thai Ice Maiden sent me another e-mail. This one began with a love heart symbol.

Actually, I don’t know how she did that. Perhaps it’s an option in her Hotmail e-mail account ?

All I can write is that I can’t wait to see her again at the end of May. I feel like a very lucky guy, but I’m proud that I gathered my courage to ask her out.

If you’re interested in reading about the Ice Maiden then click on Home. There are previous entries about her and how we met.